OMEGLE NIGHT

After some time, I finally decided to go on Omegle due to sheer boredom.



Stranger: usa?

You: UNICORN

Stranger: i own a horse

You: OMG IS IT A UNICORN?

Stranger: yes

You: WOW

You: A SPACE UNICORN?

Stranger: in training

You: I HEARD THOSE ARE VERY USEFUL

You: I'm a ninja!

You: If you must know

You: I'm also in training

You: What are you?

Stranger: i am a fully fledged ninja

Stranger: grasshopper

You: FLEDGED

You: I DIDN'T KNOW THERE WERE INSECT NINJAS

Stranger: are you a troll?

You: NO. I'M A FUCKING WIZARD!!!

You: ARE YOU A TROLLOP?

Stranger: then you are rather obsecious

You: That's not even a word

Stranger: it is

You: A word for wizards?

You: A word for unicorns?

Stranger: not really

You: HOLD MAH POODLE

Stranger: naw biatch

You: WHATCHU LOOKIN AT MY ASS FO??

You: HOLD MAH NOODLE!

You: HOLD MAH NOODLE!

Stranger: no for your noodele is obsequious

You: SEE

You: I KNEW IT

You: IT WAS A Q INSTEAD OF A C

You: JEEZ!

You: CONFUSING ME

Stranger: im dysexic

Stranger: oops

You: I GOT A NOSE BLEED

Stranger: here have this tea towel

You: Oh thank you very much

You: I like tea

You: especially when it's up my noes

You: *nose

Stranger: a tea towel is nothing to do with tea!

You: WHAT THE FUCK

Stranger: clearly you are americanese

You: THEN THEY SHOULDN'T CALL IT THAT!

Stranger: its like a towel but for dishes

You: IT CAN DECEIVE ANYONE!!!

You: TSK

You: WHAT KIND OF A WORLD DO WE LIVE IN??

Stranger: PANTS ARE UNDERWEAR FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, NOT JEANS!

You: I AGREE!

You: AND SOMEBODY SHOULD DO SOMETHING ABOUT PARIS HILTON

You: AND LINDSAY

You: JEEZ

You: THEY NEED TO VISIT A UNICORN

Stranger: COOKIES ARE ONLY THE CHOCOLATE CHIP KIND, THEY ALL HAVE DIFFERENT NAMES, THE CUSTARD CREAM, THE DIGESTIVE,THE BOURBON CREAM, THE ELKES, THE CORINTHIAN!

Stranger: THEY AINT ALL COOKIES

You: DAMN STRAIGHT!

You: FREE THE COOKIES!

Stranger: THEY ARE BEING RESTRAINED AND STEREOTYPED!

You: BASTARDS!!!

You: I WILL FREE THEM ALL FOR YOUR HAPPINESS, MY DARLING

Stranger: AND WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THE BRITTISH!

You: PEOPLE THAT LIKE BRITNEY SPEARS??

You: I LIKE THE BRITISH

Stranger: NO THE ENGLISH!

Stranger: U LIKE THE ENGISH?

You: I WANNA OWN THEIR ACCENT

Stranger: WHERE ARE YOU FROM?

You: OWWWWWWWWWWWWNED

You: URANUS

Stranger: IM IRISH, IRISH TRUMPS EVERYTHING!

You: WHERE'S THE POT OF GOLD THEN, MATE?